WHO THE DEVIL ARE YOU?
Well thank you for asking! I am a slightly eccentric* British chap who is sometimes amusing ** and often bewildered by the world around me ***. I have been described by utter strangers as being 'very jolly', 'awfully nice' and 'utterly decent' but to my dear wife I am affectionately known as 'vaguely irritating'.
I first sported my waxed moustache way back in the 1970s and have been horrified to witness the practice gradually drifting towards trendiness. As a direct result I have spent the past few years living in fear of becoming fashionable by default. However those who have come into contact with my corduroy trousers tell me that - and I quote - 'Hell will freeze over before that ever happens'. A tad insulting, but point taken!
I am the proud owner of a regular £10 haircut but taking into account my receding hairline, that will probably be down to about £7.50 by the end of 2015. I shall be spending the residue on custard.
*** sad but true