Spiffing Bits!

A determined dabble into all things delightful ...and otherwise

spiffing / ˈspɪfɪŋ / adj archaic sl.

1. excellent 

2. smart, handsome [19th c. British]

Hello there. I am 'The Major' and I'd like to welcome you to the internet outburst that is 'Spiffing Bits'. I suppose you'd like to know what this website has to offer? Well that makes two of us. Or quite possibly just me if nobody else bothers to visit.

I like to see it as a sort of 'lucky dip'. A veritable  'Jamboree Bag' of the internet age where you dive in expecting very little and are more than likely to have those expectations met. It will contain written absurdity, photographic folly and the occasional moving picture.

I hope you like it. My sincere apologies if you don't...

or 720/1080p HD video if I can find the correct settings on my camera




Well thank you for asking! I am a slightly eccentric* British chap who is sometimes amusing ** and often bewildered by the world around me ***. I have been described by utter strangers as being 'very jolly', 'awfully nice' and 'utterly decent' but to my dear wife I am affectionately known as  'vaguely irritating'.

I first sported my waxed moustache way back in the 1970s and have been horrified to witness the practice gradually drifting towards trendiness. As a direct result I have spent the past few years living in fear of becoming fashionable by default. However those who have come into contact with my corduroy trousers tell me that -  and I quote - 'Hell will freeze over before that ever happens'. A tad insulting, but point taken!

I am the proud owner of a regular £10 haircut but taking into account my receding hairline, that will probably be down to about £7.50 by the end of 2015. I shall be spending the residue on custard.

* debatable  

** questionable  

*** sad but true